Monday, December 23, 2013

Appreciation Replacements

With many offers and gifts being given, sometimes we say and do things that we don't mean, or may not realize how they impact others (imagine that!).  In order to ensure we show our appreciation or position with respect for ourselves and others, please consider these quick changes in language: 
  1. Thank you replaces "Oh, you shouldn't have".  Thank you means thanks, and you shouldn't have sounds like a slight scolding (even though we mean it was nice that the person did it).
  2. Thanks replaces "You didn't need to do that".  We need to do little in life, and hopefully do more of what we want.  People who wanted to get or give you something know they didn't have to, so just thank them for their effort instead of that awkward rejection of they didn't have to do something.
  3. You are welcome replaces "No problem".  We don't want to think anything was a problem, especially at the holidays, so showing respect in response to a thank you, means they are welcome - no problem invited/included in the conversation at all!
  4. You're welcome replaces "It was nothing".  What you did was something, so if someone thanks you, allow them to know their comment was, in fact, welcomed!  
By sharing quick responses that are kind and responsive, respectful and heartfelt, we can give and receive with positivity and appreciation!

PEAs in a Pod

"One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes... and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility. "
-Eleanor Roosevelt 
Longest-serving First Lady of the United States, Author.
(1884 - 1962)

Whether it is with a colleague, partner, child, in a personal relationship, friendship, or any work/employment situation, there are many ways to create challenges and have conflict, and also, gratefully, many ways to do just the opposite and enhance the opportunity to have enjoyment and success! 

One of the ways to consider creating a good foundation is to ensure you are both/all functioning as PEAs in a Pod.  Sure, we think of people or even animals as being peas in a pod, so to speak, when they are inadvertently doing something that is similar to one another or they present in a way that is alike.  The same is true for being PEAs in a Pod intentionally.

To establish your own Pod, here's how you tend to the PEAs:
P - Philosophy - share and listen to one another's ideas, hopes, dreams, approaches and overall outlook.  Make no assumptions.  Ask questions.  If this is for a personal relationship, you will learn what to talk about and even subjects to avoid.  For work, especially for hiring and partnering, you will know if you are coming from the same perspective in views and ideas.

E - Expectations - discuss things you want, and what you will provide.  Expectations can seem "heavy" in discussions for work or play, and yet, without them, we are making assumptions...and you know where that gets you!

A - Actions - make plans for who does what, when and where.  The how and the why are not necessarily part of this, as even those who are working in tandem can do things long as the agreed upon actions get completed successfully.  

By allowing and empowering each other to be "on the same page", or at least know and respect where you are not, you establish both a perception and a reality through which you will likely be strong in your relationship, clear in your focus, respectful in your actions, and even two or three or more PEAs in a Pod!