Monday, November 14, 2022

THIS MONTH'S Lessons Learned: Appreciative of Another Year on Earth, and Ways to Keep Learning!

Today is a happy birthday, and I am thrilled! Thanks for being a part of this year!

If there were themes for the past 12 months, they'd be Miles & Smiles, Impact & Energy, AND, Declutter & Appreciation.

By covering a lot of miles running, in a car, and on a plane, personally and professionally, certainly, there were many fond memories and a lot of smiles - some of them through some pain and feeling disappointed as well as while really having fun!

LESSON LEARNED: Smile through challenges in order to live and learn, and to get to the parts of life that really matter - making lasting memories with people you care about!

Considering impact and energy, one of my focuses was to very intentionally assess where my energy was being expended, and how/what the impact was.

LESSON LEARNED: It is key to ensure a good return on investment where energy is shared - for others and yourself, so move on when the ROI isn't there and double down when it is!

When I made time for decluttering things physically, that lead to further appreciating space and effort alike, so new donations were made, new groups were joined, existing boards were resigned from or I rolled off them while clear choices were made to spend time and give talent where it would be valued, respected, and appreciated.

LESSON LEARNED: Free yourself of clutter, any clutter in space in your home, business, and especially in your head, as that freeing feeling will allow for a sense of centering...and clear direction for progress!

Thanks for the memories, and cheers to many more as I go into being 54 with a genuine smile on my face, with intent and energy directed toward kindness & growth, and a clear mind and clean office & home - ready to embrace whatever is ahead with gusto and gratitude!

#Birthday #Thanks #LessonsLearned #Gratitude #Kind #kindness #Kindnessmatters #1KindAct #KindnessNeedNotBeQuarantined #Perspective #LifeLongLearner #AgingGracefullyIsEmpowering

Wednesday, November 2, 2022

Go from Duped to Empowered!

 “And how they take one in, with their manners and their mock wistfulness and gentleness.”

~ D.H. Lawrence, Lady Chatterley's Lover

Ever felt duped?

If you feel a sense of being made a fool, you may want to check in with yourself with these 4 questions/considerations in order to move through the situation, and avoid that DUPE feeling in the future:

1) D - Did I have a feeling about this before? (YES, then trust yourself, NO, then check in on paying attention to signs). And then do yourself a favor, and spend little time explaining or rationalizing what you missed, and spend your energy on what you have now!

2) U - Understanding what is happening now, would I have done anything differently to change the outcome (If time travel were possible)?

3) P - Pride plays a factor in accepting someone took advantage of you, so ensure you do not let pride get in the way of clearly assessing what you missed, rather than being tempted to blame others for what they did (blame gets you nowhere).

4) E - Ensure you know that how others treat you is a reflection of their integrity (or lack thereof), and instead of asking "Why me?", ask "What can I do differently for me?", and "How can I keep people like this out of my circle of trust in order to grow personally & professionally"?

You are not a dope or a dupe when you have been "played", rather you were a player in a game you likely did not register to play!

As you move through this situation, remove or distance the people who were a part of it, address it with them if you believe they were unintentional, and completely skip that part if you believe it will lead to arguing or them being further cruel in their smallness in an attempt to gain what they may have thought of as a big win by putting you in a bad place.

The temptation is often to confront someone when they have duped us, yet the leader says and believes "everyone has the right to feel as they do, and while I am feeling hurt and surprised, I also know I get to move forward and learn" where engaging further with the culprits will likely go nowhere, or worse, backward!

Being duped means you were trustworthy of someone who did not deserve your trust. It does not mean you cannot trust again or learn from your mistakes in judgment.

So, if you, like me, have been duped by colleagues or presumed friends, use your kindness toward yourself, exercise your emotional intelligence, take that experience and turn it into a badge of courage for facing yourself and your role in it, not being bitter or angry, not complaining, and coming through on the other side empowered; stronger and resilient, even if there is a little scar there! 

#DontBeDuped #Leadership #Duped #Leadership #Kind #1KindAct #Growth #EmotionalIntelligence

When you KNOW your plan &

you KNOW your alternatives &

you KNOW your resilience,


When you have NO plan &

and NO alternatives &

no resilience,


#ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #Kind #EmotionalIntelligence #Change

#PerformanceCoaching #OneBeanerPerformanceCoach #LivingKindly #Choose #Kindness #CoachsCorner #Resilience #HaveAPlan #Positivity

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