Friday, October 29, 2021

Lessons Learned: Being an Introverted Extrovert

Introverts can act as Extroverts for a short time. Extroverts are typically more challenged when faced with the Invtrovert's environment. While I am an Extrovert, sometimes there are moments, hours, and days of introversion that are enjoyable and productive.

Even though Extroverts are often thought of as vocal and Introverts are perceived as quiet, that is not exactly true. Typically, Extroverts gain energy from being around others, where Introverts regain energy from rest or being alone.

What have I learned from these sometimes chosen blocks, and other times unexpected experiences? Here are a few points noted that may assist Extroverts and Introverts alike in engaging:

Not all extroverts are huggers. Watch that as an extrovert, we don't assume someone welcomes our approach. This was seen during the pandemic, in particular when seeing someone and that person said: "I am a hugger" and came at me when I was not interested in crossing the 6-foot-barrier, let alone embracing this stranger!

The Fear of Missing Out, or FOMO, can be redirected to what I call JOCO, or the Joy of Celebrating Others. Feeling out of touch can be disappointing, and when taking on the mindset of celebrating others before scrolling social media, or listening to someone's story, will make that extroversion become an extra excited supporter of you, rather than an extra bummed bystander!

Taking breaks for Extroverts creates a sense of not being stuck or trapped, and even feeling less alone. While working solo, plan for a phone call or video conference, or meeting at strategic times of the day to gain energy.

Be aware, note, and keep in mind where you draw energy and who/what drains your energy. Similarly, know your strongest energy times of day/night, and work to have your biggest challenges and opportunities scheduled during those times, if possible. As an extreme morning person (someone who likes being up before 5:00 AM), I respect and appreciate that others do not want to meet then, so I work out then with positive people for starting strong and capitalizing on that block of time.

Since we are all either gaining or draining from experiences with others, consider whether you are Extroverted or Introverted to maximize your choices!

Friday, October 15, 2021

Staying Positive in the Face of Negativity (and during the extended holiday season)

Be happy with what you have and are, be generous with both, and you won't have to hunt for happiness.
~ William E. Gladstone

If you will consider, and even embrace the idea that the American HOLIDAY SEASON is from October 15th - February 15th, then you may start to be excited, anticipatory, stressed, concerned, or all of these all at once!

The reason for that is our expectations and anticipation of the holidays often falls short of reality, and yet each year, hope springs that desire to have the perfect holiday season, and stressors and worry start working in the background, and even come to the forefront during what is supposed to be a celebratory block of months, clouding the bright lights with complaints and disappointment!

While I get asked about facing negativity at all times of the year, during the next four months, typically, those inquiries increase. So, here are some ways to avoid negativity as you stay positive moving through the rest of the year:

Start the day with a smile at the sound of your alarm (I do it - felt corny when this came to my mind as a new habit, and now, it works to lift my face and energy)

Associate feet hitting the ground with gratitude, in other words, state internally, if others are sleeping, and externally, if you won't wake up someone else, something for which you are grateful

Have a routine that serves you well to start the day strong (I do 100 push-ups)

Keep rest, nourishment, movement, and mindset in focus (this is a talk I give often, and just spoke of it for the Dress for Success Ronda Shear Pajama Party)

Assess your habits for being well-serving, neutral, and not-well-serving in order to push toward well-serving habits

Engage with people and organizations that are optimistically realistic or realistically optimistic, and not those with toxic negativity, martyrs, or toxic positivity

Check in to ensure you are doing YOUR best, and not competing with others, rather solely with yourself that day with what you have then, and go from there

Limit your news and exposure, not to be uninformed, rather to be aware and tempered for the way it impacts you

Take action based on what you learn and can contribute rather than see what you can't do

Be present, and when you get distracted, weigh the cost of distraction versus the value of "being there"

If you set yourself up for success, it does not mean every day will be flawless, and certainly not perfect, rather, you will care to be aware, and you will then dare to spare yourself from excessive and unnecessary negativity!