Being Civil & Encouraging Civility

"Civility costs nothing, and buys everything." 

~ Mary Wortley Montagu

Lady Mary Wortley Montagu was an English aristocrat, letter writer and poet. Lady Mary is today chiefly remembered for her letters, particularly her letters from travels to the Ottoman Empire.

 (1690 - 1782)

The word "civility" is not used often, and yet civility isn't dated. Civility isn't lost. Civility is within us. Civility is an opportunity to enhance communication, behaviors, and relationships. Civility isn't just manners.
Civility is about respect...for others and for yourself.

What is "civility"? Civility is often defined as something similar to "polite, reasonable, honest, and respectful behavior". How is that challenging to embrace, inspire and implement?

Being civil is as simple as the use of "please", "thank you", "you are welcome", and "please forgive me". Civility means being sincere, vulnerable, and able to assess people and situations for the people and the situations instead of your own perspective solely. Civility is considering other's points of view, responding instead of reacting, honoring and appreciating time, and even the simplicity of using names and greetings in person, on the phone, and in emails. Civil actions lead to civility in relationships.

Be civil to yourself. How we treat others is a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. Civility starts within, and is executed without concern for positioning or personal outcomes. Encouraging civility means recognizing and appreciating it in others, speaking about those actions, and sharing the benefits of civil engagements. Leading by example consistently, with kindness and direction, thoughtfulness and consideration, is the way to remind yourself, and others, that civility is not lost, it is found in our choices each and every day!