"Everything you want is out there waiting for you to ask. Everything you want also wants you. But you have to take action to get it." - Jules Renard, French Writer, 1864-1910
While being aware of our strengths and growth opportunities is something that is important for each of us, those bits of awareness serve simply as data points for us unless we check our attitudes about them, and eventually take action.
The attitude we take based on our awareness can be positive or negative, as we can either think of how to incorporate the facts/feedback, or we can plot to defend the reasons we are the way we are. By positively viewing ourselves in a perspective of offerings and improvements, we allow ourselves the chance to both give more of ourselves and grow.
Without the open awareness and forward-focused attitude, our actions will either be to do nothing, or to do things that perpetuate or support keeping us "as is". Being aware with an embracing attitude will combine to lead us to actions that serve us well. The actions for our strengths that are productive are to exercise them, utilize them, and share them. The actions for our growth opportunities that allow for improvement are to understand them, implement new ideas/concepts/approaches, continue to recognize progress, and to stick with it.
Alas, our awareness drives our attitude, and our action is our attitude. What we know, we can process, and what we process, we can implement! So, get aware, check your attitude, and take the action that works for you in your strength-support and your growth-getting each day!
“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” ~ Paul Boese (1923-1976, American Businessman and Writer
When you realize you overlooked someone, something or said something inappropriate, ill-timed or just incorrectly, rather than stating “I’m sorry” please consider replacing that often overused expression with the request of “Please forgive me for…?”.
The reason for doing this is to make yourself vulnerable, relinquish control and allow the other person to decide how s/he wants to respond.
Asking “Please forgive me” means you know it is required/requested and that the person who was wronged is in a position to acknowledge and respond…to accept your admission or not. “I’m sorry” still recognizes something happened that was not quite right, and yet it expresses your focus on self and wanting to feel better for you rather than letting the other person’s feelings come first.
It’s a small change that may offer a new perspective, and a new consideration for how an error can be amended, and it is my belief that a sincere “Please forgive me…?” will convey a deeper interest and sincerity that a quick “I’m sorry”! So while missteps will occur, how you handle the acknowledgement of them is up to you…
"When in doubt, choose change." -Lily Leung
Yesterday I was asked a question that is asked of me fairly often by new clients or individuals taking the LUND or DiSC Assessment, and that question was "How do I change something that is not in my personality, but I want to improve it?".
Change cannot be simply wished upon us, or even thought about to make happen, rather it is a three step process, and I believe it is about how we are LED...not by someone else, rather by ourselves! Here are those steps to being LED to change:
L - Learn about what you are seeking. Read, ask, investigate. Get informed, so you are aware and know not only about it, but about the reasons you want to do it.
E - Expose yourself to people who are doing it. Gain experience through others on what they are doing and the results they achieve.
D - Do it. Push yourself to make the actions that it takes. By doing something for 21-28 days, a habit can be formed. No habits form and no change occurs without doing something!
So, whether it is to be more considerate, listen fully, engage others in conversation, lead by example instead of directing, or whatever it is you want to improve, and therefore, change, ensure you are being LED by you, for you, and look forward to the impact!
