This Month's Public Speaking Tip: 6 Parts Become 4

“If you know what you want, you can have it.”
~RH Jarrett

While we have been through the six parts (not steps) to presentation prowess and public speaking success, those six are about to become four!

The parts for which we have been covering to prepare your talk, training, or pitch include the following:

1. Open-getting attention with facts/story

2. Preview-time, agenda, purpose

3. Body-sharing the information through agenda items

4. Interaction-eye contact & audience engagement

5. Summary-check purpose, agenda & do Q&A

6. Close

So, since the Close is the restating of the Open, and the Summary is the reverse order of the Preview, your four aspects to sharing information and ideas are:

1. Open/Close-Wowing and ending with facts/story

2. Preview/Summary-time, agenda, purpose to guide and review

3. Body-sharing the information through agenda items

4. Interaction-eye contact & audience engagement

Even though you may have wished your public speaking could be as easy as 1, 2, 3, it is instead as simple as 1, 2, 3, 4!!!

Avoiding Defensiveness When Being Dismissed or Played

"No matter how beautiful the theory, one irritating fact can dismiss the entire formulism, so it has to be proven." 

~ Michio Kaku

The other day on the golf course, a male golfer who we were playing with said to me "What you need to understand is..." at that moment, as I realized what was, unfortunately, happening, my husband, Michael, put his hand gently on my arm as if to say 'I see you, even if he does not'.

I felt myself tense as the words and attitude of the speaker brought a directness that was overbearing and dismissive all at the same time.

Sure, I wanted to scream or snap back, and yet that would not have been my best moment or choice. I was not going to be played. What did I do? The same thing I encourage you to do when you are dismissed or felt like an approach someone takes with you is insulting:

1) Be thankful that person showed themselves to you, and say something like "Thanks for letting me know how you feel about that."

2) Repeat back what you heard with words like "Sounds like you believe..."

3) Bring a calm perspective with verbiage such as "Here's something to please consider..."

4) End the discussion when you want with "Let's please leave it here with this..." or "Let's please respectfully close on this..."

To follow my example, I said "Thanks for sharing your view. It sounds like you believe XYZ, and while your view is yours, please consider that it may not be that of others. Let's please leave this at being respectful of each of us having the right to believe what we believe and forcing a view, or assuming you can force a view, isn't appropriate. Thank you." We hit our balls. I was sincere in my compliments of his good shots. We had a good round. If I hadn't stood up for myself, the round would have been a waste.

So, don't be dismissed, be direct. Don't be played, be powerful. When you are grateful, confirm what you heard, stay centered, and own the end of the experience, you may have felt dismissed at first and you will likely feel empowered last! 

#DoYourBest #ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #KIND  #Leadership #EmotionalIntelligence #PerformanceCoaching #Growth

Previewing Your Content Post-Open

"I always like to look on the optimistic side of life, but I am realistic enough to know that life is a complex matter."

~ Walt Disney

People are distracted. You, as the speaker, are the leader. Remember to keep energy, stay in control, honor the audience, and set the stage!

The parts for which to prepare your talk, training, or pitch include:

1. Open

2. Preview

3. Body

4. Interaction

5. Summary

6. Close

Last month started with the OPEN, and now it is time for the PREVIEW.

The PREVIEW sets the stage for what is going to happen. It is the opportunity to:

P - Present the agenda

R - Reveal the ways to engage

E - Engage the purpose

V - Verify the time frame

I - Include others in the direction

E - Elevate the energy

W - Welcome changes, if the direction is to be tweaked

This is quick, and sounds something like this:

In the next 30 minutes, the purpose of our time together is for you to gain insights into public speaking prowess, and that will be done through the following three topics: Engaging your audience, Preparing your talk, and Delivering with impact. This is for you, about you, and you are welcome to jump in, take photos, take a break, and make the most of it all. Is there anything missed in setting the stage?"

With the PREVIEW in order, the direction will be clear and the level of engagement will be high. Expectations will be set with agreement, and then you move to the BODY (and that will be the topic for next month's tip)!

#publicspeaking #ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #KIND

Make Time to OWN Your Time

"If you're not having a good time, find something else that gives you some joy in life."

~ Penny Marshall

American Actress.

(1942 - 2018)

#QUOTE

#PresentingPowerfully

#CreateYourCommunity

#LearnWithAndFromOthers

So many people say things like "I don't have time for...", and/or "I didn't have time to get that done", and/or "If I only had time...". These are common, and yet, not sensible, as time is set, finite, and cannot be made into more or taken away.

Still, time is something some people chase, and that some people dread. What to do, right?

Time "Management" is a part of the process of addressing time ownership, and yet that "Management" is less important than our perspective and our relationship with the clock, and, specifically with the seconds, minutes and hours in our days!  Here is a list of the Savvy 7 for Not Succumbing to the Battle with the Clock, and for Saying Goodbye to Wasted Moments while Maximizing Every Minute:

1. Eliminate lists, schedule all & have buffers built-in. Yes, it reads "NO LISTS", and yet you can make a list, simply take the list and convert it to calendar items in order to really give them their "place". This will ease your subconscious wondering when you'll get to the "to-do" items.

 2. Prioritize & ask priority when people request you do something. Instead of thinking you "have to" get something done, ask when it is anticipated. Using expressions such as "Since I am working on X, when do you anticipate you want Y done?"


3. Start early & complete the worst thing first. If you tackle what you dread or dislike initially, it will be accomplished. If you do not, you may inadvertently take longer to do things in between, and eventually postpone what you have on your "dread-to-do" mind.


4. Learn to say "no" & resist "Busy-ness". When asked how you are, skip "I'm busy" and skip asking people if they are busy. If you get asked "Are you busy?", then say "Thanks for asking, it's been productive." Similarly, say "No" or "No, thank you" to requests that are not of interest. Get out of your way of feeling obliged or apologetic.


5. Time chunk & allow time to be real and it's use a tangible part of your process (not a hope you can get it done). Think in terms of 20 minutes. Time yourself. Get used to what you can accomplish in 20 minutes and then reserve 20 minute chunks for people and for accomplishing things. Hope is not a strategy, so stop hoping you'll get it all done, and know what you can get done!



6. Focus solely on something (no multi-tasking). Multitasking is really "Switch Tasking", meaning our minds have to switch back and forth, so stop forcing that extra effort and make time for doing something, or a portion of something before altering focus to something else. Resist the temptation that multitasking is useful or even possible, and you'll see and feel how much you get accomplished, really!


7. Create organizing systems (mental & physical) that work for you. People can have varied systems, and yet having a system is key. Make your piles, populate your folders, set reminder. Stick with it rather than being scattered and/or being tempted to use sticky notes as a method!


Having ownership of your time is about being in control, and therefore ready for most anything, so tackle it, embrace it, and let go of time having a hold on you as you enjoy your opportunities and challenges in the time they deserve!

Texting Tip: Your ETA Replaces "On My Way"

When you are delayed, and something happens that you will not be on time, do let others know!

Still, please resist the self-focused text:
"On my way",
as this tells us very little - where are you, how long will it take, and more - this is not giving us a lot of information!
That text serves as a gesture, and not an update.
And, replace it with:
"ETA of 1:03 PM",
since this shares that you are running behind (do apologize for that), and when your friend/colleague can expect you.

With a focus on the other person making the most of his time and not simply waiting for you, that will show respect and allow for planning for that time frame!

Communicating Presentation CANDOR

Sure, you are the expert, and as the presenter, watch staying expert and not going to an extreme in your communication by ensuring you demonstrate CANDOR, meaning be: 

C - Concise - get and stick to the point

A - Agile - be flexible and respond to the audience

N - Non-Jargon - watch acronyms and industry lingo that is off-putting

D - Diplomatic - thank people and ensure you respond with kindness

O - Open - ensure you are willing to hear things differently with interest

R - Real - admit if you are wrong, missed something or do not know

By showing sincere CANDOR, your expertise will be welcomed since you will be approachable and welcoming!

Answering Questions Effectively When Presenting

There's No "Great Question"

In a meeting or presentation, on the phone, over video, or in person, welcome questions when you are the expert/speaker/presenter.

Let people know that you are open to questions (rather than saying "Hold your questions until the end."), and when you get one, resist saying "Good question". "Good question" is an old trick for buying time. When a speaker says it each time, it is clearly insincere, and if a speaker says it often, it sounds like judgement of the question or person.

Here are three steps to effective question answering:

1) Use "Th..." words when someone asks a question. Saying "Thanks for asking" or "That's something I've explored" gives acknowledgement and appreciation for the interaction.

2) After that, address the inquiry directly and clearly.

3) From there, ensure you did, in fact, answer the question by asking "Did I provide what you were seeking"? or "Was that information what you wanted?", or "Did that answer provide what you sought?", or "Did I answer your question?". These confirming questions allow the person making the inquiry to ask more and/or confirm that you provided what was sought.

If you don't know the answer to a question, state that, write it down, and give a time and day when you'll have the answer for the person. Allow others to know if they want the answer, too, to provide their contact information to you for being copied on the answer. And then, research the answer and provide it by the time you offered!

Questions are a way for you to engage, grow and learn in presenting, so welcome the ask, and provide answers professionally for impact!

Audience Engagement When Presenting

Participation and More

A talk or presentation is typically best with engagement of the audience, and that means participation of some sort.

Here are a few ways to positively engage your audience:

• Meet people prior to the talk, or greet them if you already know them
• Walk around the room
• Make eye contact
• Ask a question and raise your hand as you are asking, so the audience knows you want their input
• Ask a question with "Who'll be the first to guess at..." so people know their guesses are okay, and then, when someone answers, repeat the guess and thank him or her without judgement
• Ask "Who wants to start us off?" and wait, rather than "picking on someone to answer something
• When someone starts responding, when he or she is done, ask that person "Who would you like to hear from next?" so that you are not calling on someone
• Use a fun object, or even a wadded up piece of paper as the talking prop that when someone has it, she or he has the floor - let people know you throw the object to, not at, others
• Call people by name
• Be sincere in your interaction
• Make the effort and have fun (without making fun of anyone other than yourself)

When you choose to engage your audience in positive ways, they feel safe, enjoy, and tend to want to be a part of the information sharing with you!

Personal Pep Talk

People often ask about mantras or words of encouragement, and a personal pep talk can be invaluable for small and large opportunities!

How the personal pep talk works is by saying to yourself:

"I want. 

I want.

I will.

I am."

And then following each line with:

Your goal.

Your action. 

Your character word(s).

For example, if you are challenged to get an assignment completed, consider something like "I want to successfully complete the assignment. I want to successfully complete the assignment. I will schedule time each day to make progress on the work...because I am a dedicated, competent Project Manager."

You state your want (the goal) twice to capture the focus and align yourself with it, followed by something specific (your action to get yourself on the path to accomplishment), and support both by your character words to remind yourself of your positive approach and value. This quick pep talk is effective for getting through a workout, presenting something effectively, completing a project, attempting something new, getting through a difficult situation, and more! Give yourself a pep talk, and get yourself going!

Public Speaking Power

Public Speaking Power

It is consistently noted that public speaking is the top fear for Americans. And yet you may want to successfully speak in public personally and/or professionally. For such formal requests for public speaking, there are four types of engagements:

Speech - written ahead of time and read/delivered at a podium or in one location.

Presentation - prepared ahead of time with some slides to support the messages for the audience's benefit.

Talk - bullet points prepared and ready to share with a lot of audience interaction and/or buy-in.

Conversation - Leading a discussion with expertise for the audience and expert to learn.

 

When you are asked to participate, ask:

• The amount of time allowed for you
• The likely size of the audience
• The demographics of the audience
• The goal of the engagement
• The types preferred (Speech, Presentation, Talk, Conversation)

Regardless of which type you are delivering, the three things to ensure for success are:

1) Be the expert

2) Get out of your own way (it's not about you or your day, rather it is about #3)

3) Put the audience first

With these quick tips in mind, you'll have fun, and importantly, your audience will be better for learning with/from you in the way that is best for the opportunity...without fear on your part or theirs!