Public Speaking Tip: Correcting Someone In Others' Presence

"Correcting bad habits cannot be done by forbidding or punishment."
~ Robert Baden-Powell

There you are in a meeting when someone states something completely incorrectly. What to do? Ignore it? Tell others? Shout out the right answer or information?

While none of those are recommended, or likely effective, or good for your reputation and rapport with that person, and others, there is a solution...or two!

When you hear someone state something that is incorrect, HELP them and the situation humbly and subtly by making sure you:

H - Heard them correctly by repeating it back, and allowing them to restate or back off, and then 

E - Encouraging them to explore what that information could do or not do if more is not considered, then 

L - List other options by leading them to an improved statement or suggestion, and finally

P - Provide encouragement and collaboration for moving forward.

It will look something like this:

Pat states sales were only down 2% and that slow marketing has the projections behind when you checked that all marketing and promotions ran as planned and that sales are down 20%.

You may think "Oh no - that's way off!!", yet you say:

"Thanks for sharing that information, Pat. Please forgive me if I heard the information incorrectly, as it sounded like sales were only down 2%." Pat may or may not agree. If Pat realizes 2% was stated and 20% was the real number, you are done, and if Pat stays with it, you then say "You likely had information from earlier in the month before our final numbers were out, and that is before some other drastic drops happened. There are a lot of reports, and very recently a new report came out that I happened to get to see. Some of the options for looking at the sales are by months, by region, or by product line, and with those breakdowns, unfortunately, we will all be seeing a 20% decrease in sales after our marketing efforts went off as scheduled. I am here to assist with how you want to address that 20% decrease with strategy, sales reviews, or a joint session with marketing."

By being direct, calm, and open while not ignoring, talking with others later, or shouting, you will allow someone to save face, you build trust, and together, you can create a solution!

#PublicSpeaking #ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #Kind #Leadership

Previewing Your Content Post-Open

"I always like to look on the optimistic side of life, but I am realistic enough to know that life is a complex matter."

~ Walt Disney

People are distracted. You, as the speaker, are the leader. Remember to keep energy, stay in control, honor the audience, and set the stage!

The parts for which to prepare your talk, training, or pitch include:

1. Open

2. Preview

3. Body

4. Interaction

5. Summary

6. Close

Last month started with the OPEN, and now it is time for the PREVIEW.

The PREVIEW sets the stage for what is going to happen. It is the opportunity to:

P - Present the agenda

R - Reveal the ways to engage

E - Engage the purpose

V - Verify the time frame

I - Include others in the direction

E - Elevate the energy

W - Welcome changes, if the direction is to be tweaked

This is quick, and sounds something like this:

In the next 30 minutes, the purpose of our time together is for you to gain insights into public speaking prowess, and that will be done through the following three topics: Engaging your audience, Preparing your talk, and Delivering with impact. This is for you, about you, and you are welcome to jump in, take photos, take a break, and make the most of it all. Is there anything missed in setting the stage?"

With the PREVIEW in order, the direction will be clear and the level of engagement will be high. Expectations will be set with agreement, and then you move to the BODY (and that will be the topic for next month's tip)!

#publicspeaking #ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #KIND

Word Choices for Engaging with Examples

"Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind."

~ Rudyard Kipling

With so many of us focused on how we feel, rightly so, and so many organizations wanting to have a culture and environment of safe creativity and personal and professional growth, many words and phrases are coming into the workplace in meetings, on Zoom, and Teams that may feel appropriate, yet lead to others being uncomfortable.

What to do?

Please lead by example by replacing words/expressions that can be emotionally triggering with these words and phrases that will still honor what is happening while keeping the energy focused on what is at hand:

"I don't like this" becomes "Because this is not a good fit for our client, let's pass on this idea." This example is about choosing what is best for the clients and not the emotional reaction to the person's idea shared.

"Nobody is supporting me in my work" becomes "Since I would like to collaborate with others, who is willing to work with me, please?". This tweak makes it less about accusing someone else or blaming others and more about a request for help.

"You need to calm down" becomes "Since your passion is clear, if you will please slow down and share, we will likely be able to follow well". This change removes judgment from someone's emotions while encouraging a change for a different outcome.

There are numerous examples that could also be added. Suffice it to say the point of these adjustments is to be empathetic without criticism and considerate without coddling. Additionally, when people approach you about others' words and/or actions, insist that it is best to not judge or assess emotions, rather to have an open dialogue about work, projects, deadlines, and expectations without prejudice or a hidden agenda. Emotions impact us and Emotional Intelligence will guide us through to positive results and real relationships!

#DoYourBest #Life #Living #ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #KIND #Leadership #1KindAct #Growth #EmotionalIntelligence #PerformanceCoaching #OneBeanerPerformanceCoach #LivingKindly #KindnessIsMyOwnSuperpower #Kindness #CoachsCorner #Resilience #Resiliency #Growth #LessonsLearned #Gratitude #Coopertition #Action

Public Speaking: Owning YOUR Introduction

My mother took great relish in introducing me as 'This is my son - he's a doctor but not the kind that helps people.'
~ Randy Pausch

Introductions should be brief. If you are a presenter, or you are introducing a speaker, please do not read the person’s biography. Refuse to do it. Embrace simplicity or abandon the formal introduction fully. 

Believe it or not, an engaging introduction can be an important part of a powerful presentation. And, a bad introduction is often a sad start for a presenter who has to first recover from the introduction and second has to attempt to engage an audience after that recovery. 

An effective introduction should be REAL, meaning the introducer simply, and only covers the: 

~Reason for the talk/presentation/training. Welcome people, and let them know what the topic is. 

~Examples of the importance of the topic. State 2-4 reasons someone will want to listen to the presentation. 

~Acknowledgement of the speaker’s credentials and name. Share 2-4 relevant facts about the speaker that will enhance the presenter’s credibility and pique the audience’s interest. Clearly and confidently state the name of the speaker/presenter last, with a pause between the last comment and the first name and a quick pause between the presenter’s first and last name. 

~Leading the applause. As soon as you finish the presenter’s name to the audience (which is done while facing the audience. 

You then turn to face the presenter as you start to applaud loudly and rapidly to indicate others can follow (and they will!). 

An example of “keeping it REAL” for an effective introduction is: 

Welcome to the Presenting Powerfully workshop (R)! 

It is important we learn to present confidently and professionally, gain tips and tools for connecting with the audience, and that we get our messages across effectively (E). 

Our speaker comes to us as an 11-time published author, performance coach, etiquette columnist for Tampa Bay Business & Wealth Magazine, and a member of the National Speakers Association. Please welcome your expert on presentation prowess, Debbie Lundberg (A). 

Applaud immediately (L)

Don't "Try It", Do Your Best!

Success has a simple formula: do your best, and people may like it.
- Sam Ewing

Yoda famously "Do or do not. There is no try" in the Star Wars franchise during the 1980 movie The Empire Strikes Back when Yoda trains Luke Skywalker in the ways of the Jedi and urges him to take action rather than simply attempting something with a half-hearted effort.

We loved it in that show, and yet it seems to have landed and been left there...

Some people say "I'll try", and others say "Let's give it that old college try" when something new is proposed to them for action.

What do you think when you hear that? 

Perhaps you think they will give some effort, and that is likely what will happen...they will "try".

Trying is our way of protecting ourselves from failure. If we try and it doesn't go well, then the thought is 'oh well, at least I tried!'

Instead, if you hear someone say "I'll do my best", or "Let's give it our best" when put in a position to participate, what does that evoke? Likely you think, and feel the energy they are going to bring - their highest effort and interest - their best!

So when you consider an effort, either say yes or no to doing your best. Stop thinking 'should I try this?'. Your time and focus are worth more than a try, they deserve, and you deserve, your best.

If "try" is in your verbiage, language and outlook in other contexts, you can shift from "Give it a try" to "Give it a chance, and instead of 'Maybe - I'll try' can become "No, thank you, and if something changes, I'll let you know and change my reply".

Similarly, and often personally, when changing a habit, instead of uttering "I am trying to cut out sugar", rephrase to "Because I want to feel my best, I am in the process of eliminating sugar." This statement shares a continuum for success versus a slight effort.

Moving from the comfort, or perceived comfort of trying, and moving to doing your best allows you to celebrate your successes and learn from those efforts that don't hit the mark. Then, instead of trying and failing, you know you did your best, and you want more time or other people, or that it is not a match for you. You can move forward with intention instead of looking back with indifference.

So, let's agree - no more trying, let's get doing, and, let's do our best!!

#DoYourBest #Life #Living #ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #KIND #Leadership #1KindAct #Growth #EmotionalIntelligence #PerformanceCoaching #OneBeanerPerformanceCoach #LivingKindly #KindnessIsMyOwnSuperpower #Kindness #CoachsCorner #Resilience #Resiliency #Growth #LessonsLearned #Gratitude #Coopertition #Action

Public Speaking Prowess Mindset

 "Fear paralyzes you - fear of flying, fear of the future, fear of leaving a rubbish marriage, fear of public speaking, or whatever it is."

~ Annie Lennox

One of the most important things in life, relationships, toasts, and in any industry is to remind yourself that your mindset in public speaking, as in every area of accomplishment, matters.

Keep in mind, front and center, that you’re speaking publicly often, and that it is not about a "speech" or something contrived, rather it is about communicating to connect, and ultimately demonstrate expertise and confidence through the spoken word. 

When you know this, and believe it, as it is developing relationships, it tends to alleviate a lot of that classroom perspective of “oh my gosh, I have to give a speech now” that unfortunately lingers with a lot of people when they aren’t familiar with how often public speaking, and even simple, effective communication, is a part of their daily successful exchanges.

For a Public Speaking Prowess mindset, think connection, not speech-giving, engaging, not overwhelming, and audience, not you, and your mind will guide your heart, and therefore, your effectiveness in front of a group of 1, 10, hundreds or more!

#PublicSpeaking #presenting #PresentingIdeas

Preparation Prior to Your Talk

"There are certain things in which mediocrity is not to be endured, such as poetry, music, painting, public speaking."

~ Jean de la Bruyere

When getting the opportunity (yes, it is an opportunity, not a "have to") to speak, remember that the moments you have the chance to share are short in comparison to the time and energy spent prepping.

While there will be tips this year on how to put together the materials and what slides to have, this tip is on preparing yourself through:

• Engaging in Emotional Intelligence and imagining what the audience will be thinking and feeling, and focusing on connecting there
• Create your presentation with your expertise driving your desire to meet the audience where they are and take them somewhere new or deeper than where they already are in regard to the topic
• Practice what you have put together by reviewing it sitting down and truly rehearsing standing up, then record it and listen to it repeatedly
• That day, be rested, grateful, and ready to share with energy and awareness of your audience by introducing yourself prior to the talk (or saying hellos to those you already know), and having a sense of connection with them sincerely

Working to be the conduit of learning and growth as you happen to speak publicly takes away much of the angst and "me-focus" by transferring nerves to energy as you engage in the "we-sharing" of presenting!

#ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #KIND #Leadership #1KindAct #Growth #EmotionalIntelligence #PerformanceCoaching #OneBeanerPerformanceCoach #LivingKindly #KindnessIsMyOwnSuperpower #Kindness #CoachsCorner #Resilience #Resiliency #Growth #LessonsLearned #Gratitude #Coopertition #PEACe #peaceful

Four Keys to Public Speaking Success!

People say “Fake it ‘til you make it,” that “You’ll get better at presenting by presenting,” to “Picture everyone in the audience naked, or look over their heads, to calm your nerves,” and “When you practice, it sounds scripted, so just shoot from the hip to sound real,” and yet these untruths are part of what makes the idea of public speaking the no. 1 fear for Americans.

Public speaking is not the problem. It’s not the issue. How public speaking is perceived and how it is incorrectly “taught” are a couple of the challenges with people being successful presenting ideas, products, and even themselves.

In the face of all this presentation confusion, how do we increase our presentation prowess? It’s by overcoming all that ill-advised counsel with truths and practical, useful tips that are readily implementable. The four keys to presenting beyond public speaking fears and misperceptions are:

1)  Be an expert on the topic, and don’t be concerned if other experts are there too. It’s a presentation, not a competition.

2) Put the audience first by setting a goal for them, about them.

3) Get out of your own way by being present and not being concerned about how you look, sound, or the day you had before presenting, or what you have going on after presenting.

4) Come from a place of gratitude, with thoughts and comments of “I get to present today at 1:00 p.m. on our first quarter 2019 outlook” rather than “I have to speak on the 2019 number later today.”

About those lies…here are the truths:

Specifically, resist “faking it ‘til you make it” by focusing on making it about what you are doing until you make it to the next step, and onto the next step, and ultimately to the subsequent results. Make it about sharing and learning, and then you don’t have to fake your interest or your effort.

Let go of the notion that you’ll get better at speaking by speaking. Sadly, you will simply get used to being average, at best, if you do not change how you are speaking. You will get comfortable speaking, and yet average and comfortable are not likely huge draws for audiences. How you improve speaking is by engaging the audience, keeping your ego out of your efforts and off the stage. When you have that all set, you can let your personality shine and your persuasiveness connect.

#IHatePublicSpeaking #PublicSpeaking #ProfessionalDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment