Thanksgiving: Over or Ongoing?

“The unthankful heart discovers no mercies; but the thankful heart will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher,Social Reformist & Speaker (1813 - 1887)

While the leftovers may be nearly gone, and you might still be "working off" the day of food and indulgences, Thanksgiving need not be "over"!

Sure, the 4th Thursday of November is behind us, and the calendar is about to be turned to another month soon, and yet there is every opportunity to turn the past into the present by keeping the feeling, the attitude and the actions of being one of "thanksgiving" alive and engaged!

I don't mean bake, fry or slow roast a turkey each day, nor am I suggesting you need family and/or friends around to give thanks. Absolutely, it is a terrific day of coming together, sharing, appreciating (and even eating and watching football), and I, like many of you, enjoy the festivities and traditions, too. Still, at the heart of the holiday is the idea of gratitude for what we have and hope for what we will create. There is a respect and calm (and that is not just the tryptophan) that comes around that one day....and it need not end with the Black Friday sales.

Instead, consider embracing each little luxury like freedom, friends, family, similarities, differences, opportunities, challenges, life, love, growth and learning each and every day...in your own way. You may opt to volunteer, write a note, share a compliment, hold a door, let someone in on the road, openly state your gratitude, or quietly appreciate someone or something. Whatever you choose to do, add a little courtesy, take a second or two, and make that conscious, appreciative point of not letting the feeling of Thanksgiving be over...rather...keep it ongoing!

Fix the Issue, Address the Person

“Never let a problem to be solved become more important than the person to be loved.” ~ Barbara Johnson, American best-selling author (B. 1927)

While it can be time-sensitive to address an issue or a mistake, it is important to remember not to break a person while fixing a problem! How we approach a situation is often as lasting as the fact that we do correct an error.

Unless there is malice or intent to destroy/destruct, then please keep in mind that the steps are to:

1) discuss and identify the error/problem

2) assess the correction options

3) agree on the best action to take (and when)

4) ensure it is clear to avoid the same or similar error in the future

5) let it go and let the person take the action and implement the learning

You may find that in a some environments you feel it is best if you act first and then address things. If that is the case, share the timing and what you did as a result, and then go through the process above for coaching.

While these steps may seem lengthy, they can be done quickly, and with dignity as well as accountability. This is not an attempt to soft-sell a mistake, rather the opportunity to not only make something "right" while addressing it in the "right" way!

The BEAM of Friendship

“To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.” ~ Brandi Snyder

Being alone can be empowering. Accomplishing something yourself is an undertaking. And yet, there are some times, many times, where the power of another person, especially a friend, can make all the difference in the world. That friend can even allow you to feel more welcomed, assertive, confident, important, fun, funny, and just real!

According to Dictionary.com, the verb form of beam means to emit in, or to smile radiantly, and, after all, isn't that what friendship can do for us?

Today, and each day, extend that BEAM of friendship, meaning:

Be a friend (not too busy for others)

Embrace a friend (who doesn't like a hug from someone who care)

Ask a friend (often another opinion can assist you with your direction)

Make a friend (you can never have too many!)

In our gratitude, interaction, and celebration of friends and our friendships, we shine a little brighter, and do make the difference in this world...we even beam because of it!

Know Their SIG Factor...

“Everyone is a millionaire where promises are concerned.” ~Ovid, Ancient Roman classical Poet and Author of Metamorphoses (43 BC-17)

When people are interested, they make promises. When people are committed, they take action. The difference in their interest and their commitment...their promises and their actions, depends on their SIG Factor.

The SIG factor is something I quickly assess in situations, and it means:

S - SKIN

I - IN THE

G - GAME

What, how, and how much of is a SIG Factor for those involved? When you expect a lot of people, you must communicate it, make it appealing, and tap into the reward/motivator of that person. From any or all of the following: the desire to participate, the enjoyment of doing what is asked, the outcome of the experience, the incentive that is available, the SIG Factor will be increased or decreased for each individual. Ensure you set your prediction of the level of delivery based on how well you have incorporated the other person having Skin In the Game in order to evaluate and anticipate properly.

The higher the SIG Factor, the greater the likelihood that the interest will yield commitment and that the person's promise will beget action.

Meeting While Eating - Business Dining Simplified

"No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation." ~ Fran Lebowitz, American Writer and Humorist (b.1950)

There are times when you are anticipating, and even expected to dine while conducting business. The holiday season that is nearly upon us, often brings about more of that than we typically experience. I am no food snob, or even Emily Post, and yet, I get asked to share tips and thoughts on Dining Etiquette, which I call "Meeting While Eating" fairly often, and here are my top 10 points to ponder:

1) When leaving the table during dinner, you place your napkin on your chair seat or back, and not on the table...it's dirty, let's keep it off the table. And, when you have your napkin in your lap, keep it folded over with the fold toward you (no bibs or tissues for your napkin's use!).

2) All electronic devices stay off the table during dining. Bring them out only before or after eating (preferably after). Not even having the phone off and face down is okay...it tells people you are possibly interested in something other than them while you are together. Let that time with the other person be "enough".

3) When you are not sure what drink or break plate is yours at a set table, Think "b" and "d"...bread and drink. By putting your thumb and first finger together under the table, you can remind yourself of that to use as "yours". And, if someone takes yours, be kind, and discreetly ask the waiter or waitress for another plate or whatever it is, instead of calling someone out who doesn't know the Think "b" and "d"...bread and drink trick/reminder!

Also, if you use sweetener/sugar packets, the empty packets are to be slid under your plate slightly, and not wadded up on the table. The waitstaff will discretely dispose of those.

4) Keep purses, keys, sunglasses, bags and portfolios off the table while eating. All accessories on the table should be related to the restaurant and/or the meal, and not coming from you...put them in another chair or under yours...or better yet, leave them locked in your car trunk!

5) When at a cocktail party, keep your right hand free to shake hands. Carry your drink in your left hand, and resist carrying food when you're on the move. Stop and eat, dispose of the plate, and then socialize. And, at all types of line-served food, buffet or cocktail party, get a new plate each time you get food.

6) When passing bread, butter, dressing, etc., you offer to your left and pass to your right. And, while we are on passing - the salt and pepper are passed as one unit...even if someone asks only for the salt.

7) Even if you are clearly at a business lunch or dinner where a sale may take place, it is not okay to bring out papers and demo items/products during the meal portion of the meeting. That can be messy for the papers and items as well as the people, so wait until you have finished eating...after all who has ever signed a contract with their mouth full of food?

8) It matters what and how you order when at a group dinner or event! Watch the lead of the host. No doggy bags. Watch ordering appetizers, finger food, desserts, coffees and drinks, as you could be "that guy" or "that girl" who is the only one with 6 courses! Use "please" and "thank you" with wait staff, as they are doing their job, just as you may be doing something related to yours!

9) Chewing of anything other than food is inappropriate - no ice, gum or items will enhance a business meal meeting.

10) Remember, unless you have agreed ahead of time, s/he who invites, makes reservations, pays, and thanks someone for joining, so keep that awkwardness of the bill off the table, so to speak, by being clear ahead of time.

Meeting while eating is a way of life for most of us, and these tips will keep you enjoying yourself, your company, your meal, and your results!

Do You DARE?

“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that things are difficult.” ~ Seneca, Roman Philosopher (BC 4 - AD 65)

With so many opportunities out there, do you DARE to to go after one?

By DARE, I mean, do you focus on:

D - Desire - what do you want?

A - Attitude, Actions, and Accountability - what are you thinking, doing, and owning?

R - Results - do you have plans, goals, accomplishments for which you are striving?

E - Examine - will you look at how to make things happen, and others' success?

DARE to do it, DARE to be who you want to be, and DARE to seize those opportunities!

Make Change Palatable with "Adjustments"

"A year from now you will wish you had started today." - Karen Lamb, American Writer

If change is something you dislike, avoid, or find others don't welcome, consider thinking of change and/or presenting it as an adjustment or an adaptation, instead.

Since change itself is not necessarily what people dislike, rather it is how it is presented that is unappealing or sadly, inconsiderate, presenting the change as something that is adaptable as an adjustment, shows more appeal, and is considerate of the other person/people.

This can work internally for yourself and externally with others, as it is realistic and palatable.

Remember, push change, and get resistance. Offer adjustments, and get collaboration!

Move from Intent to Execution

“Contemplation often makes life miserable. We should act more, think less, and stop watching ourselves live.”` Chamfort,French playwright (1741-1794)

Sometimes we have an interest and even a desire to get things done.

Other times, we make getting something accomplished a priority.

These feelings are similar to a point, and then there is a distinction in what does or does not happen from there. One has intent, the other yields results. One can lead to another...

Flatly, the connection from intention to execution is ACTION...act now, get results, be accomplished!

What Is Right In the World?

"Right is right, even if everyone is against it; and wrong is wrong, even if everyone is for it." - William Penn, English Quaker leader and Founder of Pennsylvania (1644-1718)

When people ask me what is wrong with our world today, I like to think in terms of what is right...because so much is right! Since our actions are our attitudes, and attitudes are contagious, here are a few actions to consider:

1) Speak with someone to his or her directly instead of talking about that person behind his/her back.

2) Offer fixes instead of finding fault.

3) Let your effort outshine your ego.

I'll bet you'll not only make more friends than enemies, you'll make more of a difference for someone (minimally yourself) rather than just an impression on them...and doesn't that just feel right?

Maximize Your Mozumility!

"I believe that every person is born with talent." ~ Maya Angelou, American Author and Poet, (B. 1928)

While I may have trademarked "Moxumility", there are many people I admire, and strive to learn from, who I believe exemplify the combination of Moxie and Humility. Sally Brundage, my former English and Theater teacher is one of those women, and Maya Angelou is another. I bet you have a few of those men and/or women in your life, too!

Having the moxie, the confidence and direction to stand up for something and/or someone (often yourself), and also exemplifying humility, the ability to step back, let others get credit, learn and grow with an appreciation for others and your surroundings, is something we all can do. Here are my top 10 ways to Maximize Your Moxumility:

10 - Be the expert in your space for your size, clients & offerings. Stay in that expertise and refer out to others in different areas of expertise.

9 - Be trusting to be trustworthy. Get a mentor, be a friend, and earn the right to be trusted over and over again.

8 - Be responsive instead of reactionary. Know that reactions lead to apologies often while response follow thought and consideration...leading to engagement.

7 - Be contagious. Network, and be someone worth knowing. Check your attitude, and ensure it's worth "spreading"!

6 - Be grateful instead of just full of "great"s. Being positive is one thing, being a Pollyanna is another...and not one of moxie or humility. While things may just be okay or good, be grateful for what you do have instead of what you don't have and go from there.

5 - Be absolutely, positively addicted to the truth!

4 - Be more interested in others than interesting to others. Be conversational with questions and not just stories, replies, and "I", "me", "my".

3 - Be about "What?" and/or "How?" over "Why?". Why keeps us in the past, where what and how allow us to move to the future.

2 - Be the product, and be the value. People will "buy" you long before they purchase a product. Know that, believe in you and your service or product, so others can "buy in"!

1 - Be an intentional example that others can sample. Practice what you promote. Volunteer. Give back. Let others "eavesdrop" on leading, success, and of course, your moxie and your humility!

So while you are filled both with moxie and humility, please remember to balance, combine and hone them with your own form of "moxumility"!

Awareness, Attitude, Action...Alas!

"Everything you want is out there waiting for you to ask. Everything you want also wants you. But you have to take action to get it." - Jules Renard, French Writer, 1864-1910

While being aware of our strengths and growth opportunities is something that is important for each of us, those bits of awareness serve simply as data points for us unless we check our attitudes about them, and eventually take action.

The attitude we take based on our awareness can be positive or negative, as we can either think of how to incorporate the facts/feedback, or we can plot to defend the reasons we are the way we are. By positively viewing ourselves in a perspective of offerings and improvements, we allow ourselves the chance to both give more of ourselves and grow.

Without the open awareness and forward-focused attitude, our actions will either be to do nothing, or to do things that perpetuate or support keeping us "as is". Being aware with an embracing attitude will combine to lead us to actions that serve us well. The actions for our strengths that are productive are to exercise them, utilize them, and share them. The actions for our growth opportunities that allow for improvement are to understand them, implement new ideas/concepts/approaches, continue to recognize progress, and to stick with it.

Alas, our awareness drives our attitude, and our action is our attitude. What we know, we can process, and what we process, we can implement! So, get aware, check your attitude, and take the action that works for you in your strength-support and your growth-getting each day!

Forgivness Instead of Sorry-ness

“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” ~ Paul Boese (1923-1976, American Businessman and Writer

When you realize you overlooked someone, something or said something inappropriate, ill-timed or just incorrectly, rather than stating “I’m sorry” please consider replacing that often overused expression with the request of “Please forgive me for…?”.

The reason for doing this is to make yourself vulnerable, relinquish control and allow the other person to decide how s/he wants to respond.

Asking “Please forgive me” means you know it is required/requested and that the person who was wronged is in a position to acknowledge and respond…to accept your admission or not. “I’m sorry” still recognizes something happened that was not quite right, and yet it expresses your focus on self and wanting to feel better for you rather than letting the other person’s feelings come first.

It’s a small change that may offer a new perspective, and a new consideration for how an error can be amended, and it is my belief that a sincere “Please forgive me…?” will convey a deeper interest and sincerity that a quick “I’m sorry”! So while missteps will occur, how you handle the acknowledgement of them is up to you…

Personal Change Can Be LED!

"When in doubt, choose change." -Lily Leung

Yesterday I was asked a question that is asked of me fairly often by new clients or individuals taking the LUND or DiSC Assessment, and that question was "How do I change something that is not in my personality, but I want to improve it?".

Change cannot be simply wished upon us, or even thought about to make happen, rather it is a three step process, and I believe it is about how we are LED...not by someone else, rather by ourselves! Here are those steps to being LED to change:

L - Learn about what you are seeking. Read, ask, investigate. Get informed, so you are aware and know not only about it, but about the reasons you want to do it.

E - Expose yourself to people who are doing it. Gain experience through others on what they are doing and the results they achieve.

D - Do it. Push yourself to make the actions that it takes. By doing something for 21-28 days, a habit can be formed. No habits form and no change occurs without doing something!

So, whether it is to be more considerate, listen fully, engage others in conversation, lead by example instead of directing, or whatever it is you want to improve, and therefore, change, ensure you are being LED by you, for you, and look forward to the impact!

WOW or "Wow-Effect"?

"It is generally agreed that "Hello" is an appropriate greeting because if you entered a room and said "Goodbye," it could confuse a lot of people." ~ Dolph Sharp, Author

There is a difference in a real "WOW" and just the wow-effect.

While it may be tempting to quickly tell a client or customer "sure, we can do that" because you want to get the business, or to say "I am not sure if we can do that" because you want to surprise the client or customer when you do get "that" done, are you really being a person who WOWs, or a person of woes who is going for the wow-effect?

Those who WOW go above and beyond, surely, and it is done to care for a client or customer, patient or another person. Wanting to wow is terrific, ensuring a wow by setting something up without an appropriate expectation (what I call the "wow-effect") is setting you, and your clients/customers/patients up for woes eventually.

Appropriately promise and appropriately deliver (Instead of under-promise and over-deliver, also know as "sandbagging" or over-promise and under-deliver, AKA "here comes the excuse") so that your WOW moments come in things that are truly special extras, and not just based on timing that you manipulated or inflated in order to have the wow-effect!

Character Creates Community

"I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples." - Mother Teresa (1910-1997)

While your house can become your home with your personal touches, your surrounding area can be more than just a development or city...it can really become an extension of you, it can become your community.

Community is a word often used for an geographical area, and not so commonly felt by the people who live near one other yet share no common purpose or drive.

So how does one become part of a community? Here are my ideas on sharing your character, taking action, and really generating the sense, the feel, and the belonging of COMMUNITY:

C - Care with compassion. O - Offer time, opinion, input. M - Mentor someone else. M - Meet your own goals. U - Understand the strengths of the area. N - Now is the time for you to decide if you want to be a real part of the community. I - Invest in your area...personally and/or professionally. T - Tell the story of the community each chance you get. Y - You'll benefit too, and yet it won't even be about you!

When you care, offer time, mentor others, meet your goals, understand the strengths, know that now is the time, invest in the area, tell the community story, and see the benefits to you, it will be a labor of love for your community...a real flexing of your character muscles!

Recommendation Letter Considerations

"One should not confuse the craving for life with endorsement of it." - Elias Canetti, Swiss Author (1905-1994)

Since I have applied for organizations and an appointment recently that required letters of recommendation, and having been asked for letters of recommendation half a dozen times in the recent months, it seems timely to "talk" about considerations for such letters. If you are seeking something...a job, admission into school, membership, etc., you know the most about the opportunity, and about you, so please consider the following guidelines for seeking and/or providing a letter of recommendation:

1) Ask more people than required (some people will not respond or participate).

2) Plan ahead with dates and times as requests, so that you can also send kind reminders without a panic.

3) Write a draft of the letter yourself if you are the seeker. (Yes, you write it, as you do not want to impose a huge time request on the person you are asking, and you know the two to four highlights you want to cover for the particular position/opportunity you are seeking.) If someone asks you, reply back to the person by asking that person seeking the letter to draft a letter first.

4) Start the letter with anything other than "I". Beginning with "Having had the pleasure of working with So-and-So" since...". or "So-and-So is someone who demonstrates..." is a positive, powerful way to begin!

5) Address the letter to the reader "To the Board of XYZ", or "To the XYZ Selection Committee" versus "To Whom it May Concern".

6) Provide more than one paragraph...and no more than four.

7) Change the letter to your liking once you receive it as the person being sought for a recommendation. Apologize for nothing you change, as to be sincere and keep your integrity, you want the letter to reflect what you feel/think. The seeker writing the draft is just an outline for you. Ultimately, it is your word, name and endorsement that is being recorded.

8) Proof the final product for dates, spelling and overall validity.

9) Ensure the letter is on letterhead and signed (even if scanned and emailed versus mailed).

10) If you are the seeker, if possible, plan to mail the hard copy yourself to ensure you know what product is going in, and that it is completed.

By allowing time and energy to spent on the letter of recommendation that you are seeking, you are likely going to get appreciative and eager supporters sharing in your journey instead of quick notes or the reply "I'd love to, but I just don't have time", or worse yet, something you are not proud to submit. Additionally, for the recommending party, you have made the effort minimal, and the participation and results will be maximized!

Appreciation Options

"Appreciate everything your associates do for the business. Nothing else can quite substitute for a few well-chosen, well-timed, sincere words of praise. They're absolutely free and worth a fortune." ~ Sam Walton, American Businessman and Wal-Mart Founder

Today is the 223rd day of 2012, and for each day this year, I have shared a note of gratitude through my "Attitude of Appreciation 366" personal project whereby I send a handwritten note to someone (or multiple someones) every day including Sunday for an entire calendar year. This has been a great experiment in my attention to others, and a great experience in the personal rewards gotten from feeling good about others. I share this with you not so you can feel bad about not sending note cards or tell me how many you have sent, rather this is one approach to appropriately appreciating others. Appreciation can come in the form of verbal, written or what I call "carry forward appreciation".

Verbal appreciation is well given and typically well received if you state something like "NAME, you are ____________". This way, the message is not "I think you are ____________", and it makes it more about the other person than you (and isn't that where you'd ultimately like the focus to be?).

Written appreciation can be in an email, note, card, or document to a team. The same approach of using the person's name, sharing something s/he did that was impressive, kind, or otherwise, will go a long way. Make every effort to respond to someone within 24 hours and minimally within a week following something you'd like to ensure the person knows you appreciate.

Carry-forward appreciation is the referral or the complimenting of a person to another person whether the subject of your appreciation is present or not. Carry-forward appreciation is much like "spreading a good rumor" as it is fun to do, and impacts both the person hearing you and the person about which you are speaking. Telling someone "NAME, you may already have a physician, and if you are looking for someone for a second-opinion, who is highly qualified, won't keep you waiting, and has tremendous interest in patient's well-being, you may want to consider Dr. XYZ, as s/he has been all those things and more to me."

Whatever style fits for you, please do show appreciation often. When done sincerely, it is the no-cost way to increase the value of your relationships. Expect nothing in return, and likely your appreciation will offer a lot more than just the words to the recipient, and will still bring so much back to you as well!

Your Work Completion Style

"Time is at once the most valuable and the most perishable of all our possessions." ~ John Randolph, US Politician (1773 - 1833)

Time is one of our precious, non-renewable resources. We know this.

Work takes time. We make time for things that we want to get done, and sometimes feel like we must get done. I am a bigger fan of wanting to get something completed, as it creates desire and not obligation, but this article is about knowing how you address time when it comes to work, and in particular deadlines and deliverables.

Since we are amidst the 2012 Olympics, I will call the three approaches Bronze, Silver and Gold, as they all can be successful...depending on your personality, effort, expectations and outcomes. The three approaches are immediate (Bronze), just-in-time (silver), and project plan (gold). While I am using the medals as a reference, it is not that gold is best for all, and silver is better than bronze, rather it is about knowing your style and either accepting it or intentionally changing it, instead of thinking you should be doing something differently when what you do works for you!

Bronze style means you get back from a client, out of a meeting, or have a thought, and immediately work on what was discussed. If bronze is your approach, then ensure you schedule time after each meeting, sales pitch or brainstorming activity.

Silver style is that of a person who believe s/he "works best under pressure. They tend to schedule things back-to-back and fill the days with new and more things, people, and opportunities. If you are silver approach person, then book work time in your office close the day before something is due. Ensure you book enough time, as silver style people often underestimate how long things will take!

Gold style is the project manager style approach. This is a person who wants to work a bit at a time. If you are a gold approach person, book blocks of time each week or every few days in order to chip away at parts of the work you have to do.

The Gold style may seem ideal, and it likely paces things well, but if that does not work for you, then either schedule yourself because you want the process to work, or step away from the idea of "what should be", and embrace what you are.

Bronze, Silver and Gold medals all get accolades and recognition at the Olympics, and each of the approaches to completing work can, in fact, work, too, as long as the time is allotted and planned for appropriately! I personally work all three styles with different clients and various deliverables.

Consider what is the best bet for your situation, and then embrace it...Olympic style!

Here I am running with the Olympic Torch in 2002...on my way to being excited for all that was to come!

Desire, Doubt or Dread

"In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure." ~ Bill Cosby, American Comedian & Actor

Not everything goes the way we want it to go, and surely sometimes it seems as though there is "too much" or "not enough" whether we are thinking about projects or time, or a litany of other things. Still, we are all pretty fortunate in our opportunities and undertakings...for the most part. Studies have shown that not only our abilities, but also our attitude greatly impact the results of our efforts. And, while most of us likely think we have a good, or even great, attitude, or minimally, a positive attitude, how are you doing on your self-talk, or even your "chatter"? Are you speaking in terms of desire, doubt, or dread?

I often encourage people to speak in terms of "WANT TO" instead of "need to", "should" or "have to", and that is still the case. Now, I hope you will consider minimizing, if not eliminating things like "I don't know how I can do that" (doubt) and "this is impossible" (dread), and event things that seem pretty innocent like "I can't believe this is happening" (doubt), or "I can't wait until this is behind me" (dread). This seemingly innocent chatter we share with friends, family and colleagues can be the death of our direction, as it is feeding into our questioning of our abilities and interest, and therefore, our attitudes. The DESIRE to complete something may sound a lot like the last example given, and yet instead of the "I can't wait until this is behind me" (dread), positioning your mindset in the words "It'll be great to complete this!" or "When I am done with this, I'll celebrate the accomplishment", or even "I am making strides toward finishing this" all send the message that it not only can be done, it will be done, and it is manageable.

This is not meant to be phony, and sure, it may sound like a bit of a trick to your mind. The reality is, our attitude becomes our actions. If we dread something, our behaviors will likely seem put-off or less than interested. That is not how you want to be perceived, right? Change your dread or doubt to DESIRE, and watch not only your approach change, but others' response to you change as well!

Interview Savvy - Both Sides of Table

"Never wear a backward baseball cap to an interview unless applying for the job of umpire." - Dan Zevin, Comic Writer

When we think of interviewing, we may all have different experiences, and yet, rarely is there someone we meet who has not either been interviewed or the interviewer who had an interesting story to tell, right? To avoid being the butt of those stories or jokes, here are my top ten lists for both interviewers and interviewees: For an Interviewee, after fully researching the school or company to which you are applying:

1) Ensure you are genuinely interested in the company, and if you interview during work hours, take vacation, and better yet, ask if you can interview off hours first. 2) Test your interview "look" standing, sitting and moving in front of the mirror after selecting it carefully. 3) Test your driving or transportation route prior to the interview , and arrive in the lobby 8-12 minutes early (not earlier, as you will likely just be in the way. If you arrive earlier, wait in the car.). 4) Take many resumes, a portfolio with paper and two pens (in case one fails), but leave your water bottle or coffee at home. 5) Smile, listen, be ready and engaged (be genuinely friendly to each person you encounter). 6) Look people in the eye, shake 2-3 firm pumps and stop shaking as you shake hands with each person you meet. 7) Ask no questions about pay or benefits on the first interview, but do ask if you may take notes, and then if they say yes, take notes 8) Have 3-4 deeper than surface level questions regarding the company ready for the end of the interview 9) The last question is: "Having spent this time together, first, thank you, and second, is there any reason at this point that you would not hire me?" (Be ready for the response!) 10) Know the interview is about fit - for both you and the company, so enjoy it!!! And then, go home and email and mail thank you notes to each person with whom you engaged that day. Mail them immediately.

For an Interviewer, after fully vetting the resume of the person for whom you are interviewing, and developing the core competencies for the role (6-10 of them):

1) Take control of the interview by greeting the person, saying your name, welcoming him or her, thanking him or her for being on time (if s/he was) and then looking at your watch to say what time it is, and how long the interview will last. Ask the person to sit, and gesture to where. Once he or she is seated, start the engagement fully. 2) Share what the process for the interview will be (I recommend saying something like "For the first couple questions, please just take two or three minutes, and then we'll get into the more formal part of the interview, and then I'll leave time at the end of the interview for your questions and I'll cover next steps." Smile, that person is likely nervous! 3) Ask the person for a resume, and then say something like "Tell me a little bit about you...", and see where it goes. (Don't let it go past 3 minutes - you already set the expectation.) 4) Thank him or her and ask "What did you do to prepare for today?" (This tells you about research, readiness, eagerness, etc.) 5) Explain that we are now moving into the more formal part of the interview, and for each of the next X questions, you will be seeking specifics such as the background, action and results (I call this RAISE the BAR). 6) Listen for the BAR for each question (have one question per competency). Only interrupt or correct for the "always" and "never" answers twice, as you are seeking specifics, but you do not want someone who is not listening at all to you. Mark on your page a 1 or zero under each the B(Background), A(Action), and R(Results). 7) Walk through the job description and ask if there is anything the interviewee wants to share briefly now that it has been fully reviewed. Listen. 8) Ask the last two questions of: "We have all had disappointments in life or something not go the way we expected, please tell me about one of yours.", and "What has been your greatest accomplishment or success so far?" 9) Allow time for Q & A (expect some, and don't rush it). 10) Share next steps including what happens next to when all the way through when you would like to have the position filled. Thank the person, and stand up to walk him or her out.

While you surely have additional tips, I welcome them, and in the meanwhile, minimally incorporate some or all of these for a savvy and enjoyable interview experience!